So, I Had This Crazy Idea...

"Review your matches!"
"Looking for love?"
"Your perfect match"
"Heartsong"
"Soulmate"
"Other half"
"Better half"
"Squeeze"

An endless diatribe making you feel constantly incomplete, like half of you's still out there.
Advertising streams from television screens and fills up in-boxes.
Every product, every service
Is for something someone else thinks you need, something they think you want.
And you know you do.

The love songs of the ages ring out anthems
Of attraction, desire, suffering, heartbreak, renewal...
Of someone else.

You are born incomplete, born flawed, they tell you.
But we can help you.
Just buy this and you'll feel whole, beautiful, strong.
Just use this or do these steps and you'll find true love,
Love that won't cheat, leave, lie, steal, lose interest, or hurt you.

What happens when you don't find it? When it doesn't work?
What happens when you lose the pounds, make the money, look the part, and nothing happens?
If all the love songs of the world wax poetic of other people,
Where's the person responsible for your happiness?
You buy in, sell out, give in, and they cash out.
You construct yourself to please that idea, that mask, that filter, that little box.
And the more others start to like you,
The more you hate yourself.

Self-help books and therapy, ruin after ruin after ruin, and for what?
So you can heal just well enough to seek out your next lover?
What happened to the compassionate head, the heart who thinks?
Our self-esteem has become other-esteem, other-praise, other-approval, and nothing is left for each one of us.


Try something for me.
For two seconds, try to step outside this obsession.

Imagine one of your favorite love songs.
Then concentrate on who it makes you think of.
I guarantee there will be at least some pain you associate with that person.
A memory of betrayal, death, distance, or even just disappearing.
If you feel no pain, it's buried; trust me, it's there.

Try something for me.

For just a moment, put yourself into that person's position.
Be the person you sing that song to.
Every part of it: the things you like about their body, the memories, the desire, the adoration, the pedestal, the chase, the longing to show them off, the feeling of completeness they bring you.

It may take hearing it several times, and you'll probably feel ridiculous at first, but keep at it.
You may feel like you're going to be committed.
But just try it.

If you had one ounce of the love, the craving for yourself
That you look to give to someone else,
Just imagine...
If you could wrap your arms around your own heart,
Just imagine...
If you could feel that alive while sitting alone,
Just imagine...
If you could feel completely free within the confines of your own body,
Just imagine...
If you could take off your skin and find that the heart that beats there beats for you,
Just imagine...
If you could follow yourself on your own path,
Just imagine...
If you could make love to yourself,
Just imagine...

Just imagine what you could be, all by yourself.